If you are asking this question, the simple truth is that you will probably benefit from couples counseling. Most couples wait six years too long to get help. By then, what started as a small, solvable problem that could have been dealt with through dialogue frequently has become the gateway to a deeply embedded problem that is attached to years of hurt and disappointments. It is much easier to fix a new pothole than to repave an entire road. But, just as old roads can be remade, even long-standing problems can be smoothed out, it just may take longer.
The marriage researcher John Gottman found that people in long-term happy relationships have conflict. Conflict is not the sign of a bad relationship. The problem is when conflict begins to define the relationship and is dealt with through harmful patterns of communication, such as stonewalling, criticism, contempt, and defensiveness.
Couples counseling will help you identify where you are ineffective in connecting with your partner and why. It then provides you with new ways to talk about the same things, only this time you make progress and work as a team. The counselor works with you to set goals that are unique to your relationship and highlights all the things you are doing right along the way.
There is one important situation to note where couples counseling would not be helpful, and this is in the case of domestic violence in which one person is afraid for their physical safety with their partner. In this situation, individual counseling is the best option.
Most couples are well-meaning people who accidently hurt one another. Couples counseling can help you dig out from under the weight of the past and find the life you once enjoyed in your relationship.